Bedroom Battleground
A 15 year old's bedroom doesn't have to resemble a teenage wasteland. Learn the art of compromise and control to help them create the perfect space
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Concert posters, clothes covering the floor, celebrity icons – if you have closed the door of your teenager's room to pretend it doesn't exist, you're probably not alone. But as a parent, choosing battles with your teenager wisely can make all the difference – especially in their bedroom.
"I think any teenager's room these days is contrary to the rest of the house if they truly have any individual aspiration,�" says interior designer Lauren Jacobsen, Lauren Jacobsen Designs, Studio City, Calif. "But it's still a parent's home, so to just let the teenager go, that's how you end up with black walls and craziness – [so] maybe there's a little negotiation there."
Rather than try to control your teenager, experts like Jacobsen and New York-based interior designer Katie Ridder say it's important to give your adolescent choices and to work together instead of against each other. Jacobsen and Ridder offer the following ideas for compromising with teenagers about their rooms:
*Get involved ... "Parents can wheedle down what their teenager wants," Ridder says.
*But not too involved. "Oversee things a little bit, but your teenager is at the stage that they're figuring out who they are, so you have to try and respect, promote and support that for your child," Jacobsen says.
*Create a dialogue. "Ask them what kinds of things they're interested in," Jacobsen says. "Get a sense of what the teen likes as far as what's happening in their life and things they're looking towards to help create individualism."
*Give them choices. "Show them a few schemes and decide together what is appropriate," Ridder says.
*Allow them to express themselves. "As the mom of a teenager myself, I have let my daughter create her own space," Jacobsen says. "I'm not going to let her do something too crazy because it's still part of the entire household; however, I say 'I'm going to give you this space as your bedroom but the rest of the house is community space' and hopefully get them to respect that."
*Make it fun. "Make it something you can do together," Jacobsen says. "Most of the time teenagers are so surprised that you're doing something for their room like that. They"re usually pretty thrilled they can fix up their room and that kind of thing."
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